An Open Letter to the guy who was driving too slow and then sped up after I tried to pass him

Hey there, 'guy who was driving too slow and then sped up after I tried to pass him'. How's it going?

I couldn't help but notice how you sped up after I changed lanes and tried to pass you. I hope you didn't take my trying to pass you personally. I just felt like driving a little faster.

The thing is GWWDTSATSUAITTPH, you weren't even really driving that slow. You were trolling along at, about, 38 MPH in a 45 MPH zone. You were probably looking for an address or a place to stop and eat. You could have been trying to sneeze. It's not important. The important thing is to know that we weren't actually racing. We were just two guys driving our cars. One was focused on a destination, one was just cruising along.

It probably scared the shit out of you how I just jumped into that other lane like that. The only warning I gave was a turn signal. Who can blame you for reving your engine and accelerating forward like that? I feel responsible. Maybe you were being playful. Maybe, that was your way of having some fun. Maybe I was suppossed to speed up too.

I feel so stupid. I feel like I missed out on a chance for a little adventure on my way to work. Fuck!, 'guy who was driving too slow and then sped up after I tried to pass him', why didn't you give me a thumbs up or something? Why didn't you let me know what was going on? We could have had ourselves a moment.

Also, GWWDTSATSUAITTPH, your bumper sticker was hilarious. It took me awhile to figure it out, but let's just say we're both clear that you're pretty fond of the opposite sex. Good luck with that.

I hope this letter helps 'guy who was driving too slow and then sped up as I tried to pass him'. I hope we understand each other a little better. Next time, I'll just stay behind you and take my time getting to work. I'm truly sorry.

Have a bitchin' summer Guy.

Sincerely,
Greg Bauch